The hysterical screams and sobs that echoed through the
mansion brought Marguerite to her feet. Tearing through the hallway, she
reached the guestroom where two maids, with the assistance of Mary, were trying
to restrain Cicely who was in one of her outbursts that had grown more frequent
in recent days.
"Begging pardon milady, Miss is trying to throw herself
out the window again." A maid tried to explain after Marguerite had helped
calm Cicely as they coaxed and put her back in bed. The pain etched on Cicely's
face and the wild state of her hair brought new pain to Marguerite. Biting back
useless tears, Marguerite stroked Cicely's hair, noting the new spots of blood
that dotted Cicely's nightgown. Without flinching, Marguerite looked to check
that the stitches on Cicely's mound had not been torn in one of her frenzied
outbursts as had happened only three days ago. Cicely was starting to heal
physically but Marguerite feared the same could not be said for her mind.
Noting the worry on Marguerite's face, Mary tried to reassure her mistress.
"My lady, do not worry, time will heal us all."
Grateful for the loyalty of her maid where only condemnation
came from her own family, Marguerite hugged the maid who was barely a year
older than her.
"Are you still troubled by those night fears?"
Marguerite asked with trepidation, knowing all three were
plagued by night fears frequently in their first weeks of recovery. Mary shook
her head even as her trembling hands proved her lie.
"Mary, you need not comfort me by concealing those
fears," Marguerite said softly as she gripped her maid's hands.
"No, my lady, they are truly fading. I...I am uneasy
because I have not had my courses since...since that night."
Staring in horror at Mary, Marguerite realised the import of
her words. At Mary's pointed glance at Cicely, Marguerite's horror grew.
With some effort, Marguerite stemmed the bile that
threatened to rise and reassured the worried maid that she would find a
solution.
Marguerite was not surprised to find Henry waiting for her outside the guestroom. They had become accustomed to these night rituals, Marguerite thought with bitter irony.
The lines of exhaustion that ran along Henry's beautiful face brought a familiar ache to Marguerite's chest. They also brought an understanding that the present situation was untenable.
Marguerite's request to retire to the study for a discussion surprised Henry. Seeing the firmness and resolve in her expression that had disappeared since that disastrous night brought both relief and unease to Henry.
As he watched Marguerite seat herself across from him, Henry felt himself dreading what she had to say.
Forcing herself to get the words out of her mouth rapidly, Marguerite spoke without hesitation, avoiding Henry's gaze.
"Henry, you must announce that our engagement is off."
Holding up her hand to forestall his protest even as Henry jumped to his feet, Marguerite soldiered on. "You must, Henry. You know, the ton has heard the gossip that has spread since that morning I arrived on your doorstep with Cicely and Mary."
"You know I do not care for the ton or its opinion-"
"I care, Henry. And unless you wish to increase my misery, you will not insist on continuing our engagement. For all purposes, Marguerite Crofts, your fiancée, has ceased to exist since the attack."
"No, you are alive and I still love you, that is all that matters."
"Stop fooling yourself, Henry. You know that even your position and power cannot completely protect me from society. The best I can hope for is to disappear from society and for all to regard Marguerite Crofts as one who has never existed in this world."
"No! That cannot be. I will not allow that! No one would dare to insult me or my family, they will accept what I say."
Glancing with weariness at her fiancé, Marguerite knew he was in denial. "You know the truth is far from what you have said. The ton will condemn me if I dare to defy the rules and reenter society. A ruined woman will never be accepted back into its fold. This is something we have to accept. Not even a duke can change that."
Grasping desperately for a solution, Henry's next words came without thought.
"Why will you not reveal the names of your attackers? Surely you know some of them. Was William Wentworth not one of them? Marguerite, I heard his name among others that you kept repeating when you were in a delirium those first days after you returned. Once they are brought to justice, things will be…"
Henry’s voice trailed off as even he realised how impractical his words were. No, Marguerite was right, the ton would never accept her again, however unjust it may be.
"Henry, you have seen how my own father reacted to the truth I revealed of William. Do you really think society will react differently? Gentlemen are rarely doubted or blamed but for women, that is hardly the case. They will excuse William and the Brotherhood, but they will never excuse me for my loss of virtue even if I did not cause it."
"Henry, you must let me go. I could not bear it if I dragged you into the mud along with me."
The stubborn set of Henry's jaw told Marguerite he was unconvinced.
Swiftly snatching up the sharp letter opener on his desk, Marguerite held it to her neck before Henry could react.
"Promise me, Henry, you will make the announcement soon."
Fearful of triggering an act of desperation, Henry sought to distract Marguerite. "Where can you possibly go? You have seen your parents' reactions, they will not offer you safe haven."
"They will, if you convince them. I doubt my father prefers ruin to sacrificing a small estate. Swear you will do what I ask of you, now, Henry."
Henry nodded slowly, hoping to placate her.
To be continued...
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